i was the most angry without a vent that i have ever been today. and in the course of 12 hours its gone. i hope i didn't offend or over react to anyone that did not deserve that reaction.

the sad part is, the person that pissed me off the most is the person that i thought i was the closest to. you know, it would instantly agrivate anyone, i belive, when you pour your heart out to someone and they dont give you the decency to read what you had to write... yes thats right, its been sience November 11th. nothing. all i have to say is wow, i really must be blind.

sorry, it had to be said.

but i'm better now, no worries, i just have to keep walking, some day i'll reach that oasis in the desert of life.


i love and i hate RENT for what it makes me feel...

Just went to see rent a second time with Kristina. saw rent for the second time, first time with Kristina. I love how music can make you feel emotions even though you dont nececarily have any action behind them besides the music.

I'm listening to the soundtrack to see what i missed in the countless times of listening to the same songs. I dont know if its the timing or what but man, these things are getting to me, because of music. showing me emotions that have opened up and the start of new things.

I'm going to start my second blog on Christmas, as a birthday present to this blog. a kind of reprive from the daily grind that useuall happens on here. because i seem to be the only one who keeps their blog updated. i dont know about you, but i keep all my friends blogs in my favorites folder.

So this one will revert back to its bitching / mass information page. The new one would be a daily rambling on what i think about on a ... well... daily basis. or as close as i can to be daily. i have allot of shit to say and i think of allot of random things on a daily basis, so i don't think thats going to be a problem, i might not just let everyone read it though, just my friends. i.e. people who i let read it.

not that i need to be secritive about my thoughts, i'll keep the same rules, its just that not eveyone needs to know what i'm doing all the time. and i might not ... i don't know, its just an idea, i have time.

should i get Kristina a christmas present?

should i get kari a christmas present?

should i get anyone a christmas present?

i never give out christmas presents, this year because i'm poor.

but i'll start a list of what i would have gotten you if i had money. haha! what a great idea! they say its the thought that counts!


Family: Wanting to know what to give me for christmas, not that i know what i want...
Fraternity: BROTHERS ONLY THIS WEEKEND
Social: trying to think of ideas for good ferris parties...
Money: getting better, paying the water bill, eventually...
Work: slept for an hour and a half on 'black friday'... what a job...
Females: second date...well... offical date
Drama: its not drama if the person doesn't aknowlage you, but then why would they...
School: exam monday, and i need to memorize my lines...
Friends: went to Iowa, good times. Tequila makes people stupid....er.
Health: thinking about buying food with this paycheck....maybe...
Song: Listening to RENT, again... but this new song by James Blunt -- Goodbye my lover... its deep... i like it
Last Laugh: Mark dancing in slow motion durring 'La vi bohem'