so its been a while, and i left you all hanging there wondering what was going on with me. that is awesome, thanks for those who care.

i got the job.

i'm happy, stressed, but happy....

but now i'm really really drunk ad my mind is flowing on many of things.

let us revert to the fact that the name of this blog is the nion-discrimintory bitch session, so i dont discriminate. i spell horribly, but i dont discriminate, if i got a problem, you should know before its on here.

i've been with Krystal for a little over 4 months now, and i enjoy every second i have with her, shes a keeper. i acknowlage that. but lately i've been buged about one thing from my past. the fact that my last love, Kari, not stunted me, but i cant find a better word for it. i cant think of saying i love you to krystal. and i think its because of that past relationship... i might just be being a sentamental guy seeing as it was pretty much this time last year i thought i was with the perfect person that... poof... jjust stopped loving me. maybe that si holding me back. i know i want to be with krystal, but i know know that jumping in with the L word too soon will do weird things to a good thing. granted, when i say it, i damn well mean it. hell, its still hard to not say some diriviative of it to Andrea when i call her (wich reminds me, i drunk called her on the stumble home.... ooops...). I'm not a promiscuous man, even though my persona depicts it. yes, i woudl like to be on the prowl, but why?

i have a wonderfull lasss, that may not know better. i feel bad, dating a young girl, not so far in college to expereience life. i dont want to smother her and be the only thing shes got. honesltly, i would be upset, but understanding if she found somthing better when she gets back to uww. buti cant think of that. shes my girl, i do think i'll use the L word when i'm good and ready (even though it'll be taken as sarcasm like everything elce in our relationship...). but for now, all i do is think about the past...

it bugs the shit out of me that i'm loding the relationships i've had with friends. Dennis is married (no you didn't miss the wedding, unless your reading this after august 16th, 2006... then you did). hes already a 'responsible' adult. doing married things, like buying a condo, getting joint checking accounts, having his woman tell him what to do, not having free time. but were all growing up and i have to accept that. Tommy has been my good friend for years now, and were drifting apart fdaster than ever. granted some of it is my fault for not really liking some of the BS that leah pulls, but thats another rant COMPLETELY. but were on totaly different sceduals, so we can never hang out, and when we can, its interfering with leah time, wich i can bow too. cause she gives better lovin than me, heh. but still, all paul does is play video games and never want to do anything but go to the bar and yell at me when i have to go home so i can work.

i'm rapidly losing my social life and it scares me. Soon all we'll have is a monthly card game, that the wife willl yell at 33% o f us ofr spending gas money on, 20% of us will get called home because the baby is not going to sleep. and 50% of us will have jobs that will in some way or another will interfere.

i just cant wait for the day when i know its all disintigrated, when one of my life long friends, one of my bvrothers will, when 'catching up' will try to sell me somthing for his work because he has nothing better to talk about. that, is when i leave. i know i cant live like this. i know it wont be ferris forever, but damn it, i can try to hold on to my friends cant i? i can TRY



well then on to somthing completely different... what elce has happened sence we last talked.. or you last read.. or whatever *checks last entry* pretty much nothing, but the job, has changed. i'm not working at Harbor House anymore, just cause i cant find time. i'm making a SHIT TON (almost 2 G's before taxes the first real paycheck...BOYAH), and i'm gaining respect like a motherfucker.

i just need to get a life.

all i do is sleep, and work. i want to do things, but i STILL have the morning mentality.

*sigh* i cant think anymore, too drunk... i'm to the heavy eyes, cold sweat portion....





Family: So it was my parents ##ed/th anaversary (yeah, i'm a horrible son and i dont know how long the've been married...ask them what year i was born.... i dont feel THAT bad).

Hobby: I've consolidated them all into a closet... no... not the dead bodies, but the shells of PC's i'm hopefully going to work on soon... i gotta get 100% moved in first...

Social: need to get one of those.. all i have are my dreams, and the people who know me... the bartenders at the Old Town Pub..... sad...

Money: actually vomfortable enough that i MIGHT be able to pay of my personal debts... maybe

Work: Assistant Manager of a 2.5 million dollar store. My own desk. My own buisness cards. My own responsiblity. my own control to not burn myself out.

Females: i thuroughly enjoy the peresence of my female companion. VERY MUCH SO. that is all...

Drama: Leah hates me. and i'm not too sory about it. dont know why i'm not, i'm useually a pretty laid back guy about bull headed people, but for some reason, if tommy and Leah ever got married, i'd have to seriously think about atending... i love my bro but damn he attracts the PSYCOS

School: non-existant at the moment. after school officially starts i'm going to consult the person i should have schmoosed to get into school, before my promotion, to see if i can work a school scedual arround work... good luck me...

Friends: I need more variety. seriously...

Health: I'm worried about my hands.. all those years of cracking my knuckles, i think somthings wrong with my right hand... it just feels old...

Song: not sure, i've been on random allot lately, but after picking up the ben folds;live in perth dvd, yea, back on Ben Folds...

Last Laugh: Mooney talking about how bill and ted had the right idea on the vasis of all religons..."Be excellent to each other, and Party on Dudes!"